My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
even my farts smell like vagina
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
