I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
