? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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