at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
