Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize