At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Ladies don't puke and tell
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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