If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Randomize
