After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
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You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
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She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
not ubering you a puppy
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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