You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
