I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
