I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
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