I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
