just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
this hospital has no fireball
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize
