I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
we're so committed to being not committed
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
