Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize
