hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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