Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
