I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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