are you so shy because you have an std?
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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