Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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