Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize