I heard we made out
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
