I think im going to throw up on grandma
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
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