I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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