'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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