i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
