susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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