I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
