Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
