I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
