So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.