summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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