I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I bet he comes in French.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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