There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
