Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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