did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize
