I want to stick my p in your. b.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I FOUND THE LEGS
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
