I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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