dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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