miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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