I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Randomize
