I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
North Korea, Best Korea!
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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