I'm jealous of your bromance
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
