Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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