office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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