; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize
