Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
