on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
