does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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