i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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